| 10/5/2005 - 15-year-old Michelle Wie announces her intenions to turn professional and signs endorsements valued at over $5 million per year |
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 | MIchelle, other than the money, what are you looking forward to most as you embark on your professional creer? | |
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| I can't wait to hammer those chunky LPGA dykes! And in a few days, I'll be old enough to drive. | |
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| Meanwhile, on Madison Ave . . . |
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| I think we hit a homerun on this one, Collins . . . or, if I may, a 'hole in one!' Ha-ha-ha!!! | |
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| Do you see how my erection makes me look heavy through the midsection? | |
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