| The Press meets the Prez. (SHSU's Prez, that is) |
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 | Delusional... Perhaps you've heard of it...nah | |
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| Ours is a small, but robust college destined to join the ranks of shuch prestigious colleges as our neighbors, A&M. .... Perhaps you've heard of them. | |
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| Affordable education and a big honkin' statue just not cutting it anymore, eh? | |
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| I have been doing my best to figure out ways to raise awareness of our great institution..... | |
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| Well, at the rate you're using up parking space with useless buildings maybe you two can share a parking lot someday. | |
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| I have decided that it's time for other colleges such as our neighbors A&M to notice us and give us the respect we deserve. | |
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