| Dewy Decimal, wondering where Guy has gone, can only listen in horror at the news of Lady Reporter's latest evil-doing. |
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 | Ms. Decimal, I have a fresh drink and some bad news. Every single book in the Humanities Archtives has been stolen. And the head of the department was somehow transformed into a dog. He scampered off and nobody has seen him. | |
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| Oh the Humanities! How could it be? Where is Guybrarian? Has he abandoned us in our time of need? | |
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| Lucky for Lady Reporter, her minion Les A. Suming has tracked down I.M. Reading, now a fluffy puppy, sniffing around Brooklyn. |
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| So glad to have found you Mr. Reading. I'm here to tell you there's someone who can help. If you'll follow me, I can show you to my master's abode. | |
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| Mr. Suming, hello. I've heard a tree grows here. Do you know where it might be? I'll have to find it later. Show me to this mystery person whom you claim can help me regain my Humanities. | |
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| Meanwhile, Lady Reporter prepares to trek back to Earth to search for Guybrarian herslef after an extensive Google search shows he's nowhere to be found. |
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| Sweetie, are you sure you don't want a snack? | |
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| Dammit, Mom! Get off of the computer! I'm trying to find my archnemesis! | |
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