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 | HAPPY NEW YEAR!! |  |
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 | HAPPY NEW YEAR! |  |
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 | I can't wait to see what happens this year! Maybe we'll get a cure for malaria, or a stunning technological advancement! |  |
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 | Maybe even a cease-fire in Iraq, or a stunning comeback by the Ottawa Senators and they take the cup? |  |
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 | This just in: Taliban Terrorists have hijacked a plane filled with the entire Ottawa Senators team and crashed into the Malaria Research Plant in Kentucky. Also, Sony has announced an error in their Blu-Ray discs and is instructing people how to fix it themselves by voiding the warranty. |  |
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